I think it been long that I really a post about what i think.
I try to keep short as I know I alway make it too long for you guys.
If you may wonder why I name it as twice, I got my reason, better let you see what I mean.
So this it’s how it began,
of my mind thinking and thoughts,
silently,
…
I walk a path and pause than turn back and saw the path that i have taken,
Why have I taken that path,
filled with regret,
that what you want to tell me don’t you?
I have fallen to your trap a lot of time i know,
I don’t need you to remind me of it,
I clearly know,
but I need to move on,
a new life,
and stop asking stupid question.
Maybe that will never happen,
life will not be interesting without them,
and ideas.
I saw Jocelyn blog and I saw her taking the same path that I toke a few years back,
the same path you instructed me to follow with your empty promise of sweet and
meaningless gain.
But was blinded by your darkness, drove me mad, lose control of myself and became your puppet of evil.
It hurt to see her going the same path as me know what will happen to her,
silence Cry that no one can hear, darkness that no light can penetrate through.
It is a scary world that I found myself stuck inside,
True madness,
pity to the soul,
pain of pain.
Somehow found my way out of it and to the bliss of light.
Maybe it’s the will of God that i gone through this for me to grow stronger,
who know’s?
Why is there suffering,
I once ask,
sometime you don’t know bout yourself but you are cutting your own wrist at the same time you asking the question and bleeding to your death.
It funny and amusing to see that till now.
I try to understand everything but instead I make a mess out of myself.
A mess I make that can’t undo.
Turning in circle coming back to the same question and that what you want,
and you get angry when I broke free from this cycle.
Shame on you!
Oh yeah the no shame on you to be ashamed because you delight in shame,
so I rephrase it,
May God Curse you for all eternity!
Let get over with,
don’t waste my strength on you, Devil.
Let talk about life,
i recently went to objectif a photography shop to get my flash but it was close,
this really get me mad because the a note pin there we are close from 24 Dec to 4 Jan and this is not the first time this is the second time.
Nevermind I went to CMPB and close too and also the second time and this time I am really piss.
Both failed me twice,
just now I tell you all later you will know this is why.
I finally want get a girl,
so I tell you my type,
so girl out there beware papa is come after you,
that sound so wrong,
whatever haha,
let rephrase it,
girls out there there’s a man who want your affection.
I like girl who is not to skinny about Katarina is ok any skinner that is really too skinny except dawn she is different.
Why I say dawn is different because she only girl in church I got crush on and she not the type I mention but I still like her, plus she is tall.
I like a girl like the movie “My Sassy Girl” the main actress she really cool when I saw the girl I knew I want that type of girl quite violent but caring. Some who a bit fierce.Some like Jiayi maybe? Not saying she fierce but someone like her personality.
Biblical is a must so all my other crush is out except dawn though.
Know media like photography and all that.
She is a good talk starter and know when to talk that quite important. Because I not.
The rest is really non-major points.
Got to rest for the night, tomorrow still got service.
